A Welcome Letter for October

When the things you love threaten to burn you out. PLUS 9 things I'm looking forward to this month.

Welcome to Making Time. Each week, I share thoughts and ideas for making more time for yourself by building creative energy and establishing rituals and practices. If you’d like to follow along, you can subscribe for free.

At the start of each month, I share a list of 9 things I’m looking forward to. I believe that looking forward to things helps us notice and appreciate them more. Please share your own in the comments, I’d love to hear them.

It’s Monday evening and I’m laying in my hammock, staring through the branches of douglas fir towards a bright September sky. I feel completely spent, almost unable to move. It’s only 5pm, but I could crawl into bed right now.

Yesterday was Stitchfest, our second annual in-person event for our Seamwork community.

I spent most of the day on stage at a small theater, speaking to a crowd of incredibly creative, thoughtful people. We recorded a live podcast (with special guests, our friends Helen and Caroline from Love to Sew), had a handmade fashion show (it seemed like nearly everyone there participated), and ran around talking to all the friendly faces.

You’d think this would be a huge challenge for an introvert, but I was exhilarated. For whatever reason, public speaking doesn’t freak me out, or at least not when the crowd feels like a bunch of friends. And meeting all of these wonderful people, many of whom I’d only seen online, was pure joy.

When the event ended, the team went out for pizza and drinks. That’s when I started to fade, still feeling a full heart but increasingly unable to make conversation or string together a coherent sentence.

How odd, I thought. I feel ecstatic, but my brain seems to not be functioning anymore.

Susan Cain

writes that this is a common trait of introverts, that social events take rather than give energy. While that’s true for me, I find it curious that whenever I talk about this with others, even the most seemingly extroverted people report the same feelings. It seems that everyone believes that they’re secretly an introvert, which makes me question the whole concept.

But while I was certainly feeling tired that evening, it’s now, the next day, that it’s really hit me. All that adrenaline and excitement from yesterday completely depleted me, leaving me in a puddle by the time the work day ended.

I had a list of things I wanted to do after work, but instead, I headed for the hammock and an hour of nothing.

As I lay here just staring at the sky, I realize how easy it is to believe that you don’t need rest when you enjoy what you’re doing. When “work” feels fulfilling and even fun, it’s tempting to keep at it, ignoring the signals that you’re using up your energetic resources.

But even the fun stuff requires something from you, maybe even more than the tedious or boring work does. That reservoir of energy needs to be replenished.

We often think of burnout as stemming from some sort of misaligned drive to achieve, to always work harder, or to prove yourself. I’ve found that, nearly as often, it comes from enjoying the things I do enough that I don’t actually want to stop.

This goes for my job, but it also goes for the numerous creative projects I always seem to have on the go, the garden I work, socializing with friends.

Sometimes you just need a break, even from the things you love, and let those reserves fill back up.

That’s a lesson I hope to take into fall.

Welcome to October

Here are 9 things I’m looking forward to enjoying this month:

1. The last of the dahlias

I visited the local dahlia farm last weekend, which was magical. I’m going to keep enjoying these colorful beauties and start planing next years’.

2. Harvesting and cooking quince

Our tree is heavy with fruit, and I’m looking forward to finding new ways to use this perfumed, subtle fruit. Please send any recipes my way.

3. New morning routines

Fall is the perfect time to reset daily routines, and I’ve mapped out a new one that I’m hoping will give me more time for writing, sewing, and getting outside.

4. Diana Henry cookbooks

I love Diana Henry’s approach to the seasons, and I can’t wait to spend time pouring over her books at the dining room table, including her newish one, Roast Figs, Sugar Snow.

5. Scary movies and pie on Halloween

That’s how we spent the evening last year, so perhaps we can make it a tradition.

Yes, Lucy looks alarmed here. By a Bruce Campbell movie. She’s a delicate hothouse flower.

6. Cleaning the garden up

Collecting the very last of the harvest in the garden, clearing everything out, and preparing for next year.

7. Taking Gordy to the pond

Walking around the local fishing pond with Lucy has become one of my favorite things to do. I’m a little nervous about taking Gordy because he immediately dives into any water he sees, but I think he’ll love it if we can keep him under control.

8. Foraging

Foraging for leaves and grasses to bring inside and decorate the house with, like a little bower bird.

9. A new meditation class

I signed up for a gong meditation class with a couple new friends, and I’m looking forward to exploring something a little different for me. I haven’t meditated in a group setting in quite a while.

What are you welcoming this month?

What is one thing you’re looking forward to enjoying this month? Share it here, and perhaps you will appreciate it all the more when it arrives.

Thanks for reading Making Time. If you’re new here, you can subscribe for free to receive new posts each week. And don’t forget to join me in The 2024 Slowdown this year.